Today was quite a tiring day... Woke up really early in the morning, though it was a saturday, and went for my morning drive. At the end of the whole thing, I was really really tired, and still drove to IKEA because mum was there. Had a walk there and the Curve whereafter we went back...

In the car... I looked at the time, the seconds... slowly ticking... How would it feel to look at the time, knowing that every second that passes by means you're one step closer to the otherworld, one step deeper into life...?

I couldn't understand how is my wheel turning... In quick instances, the past flashed pass my mind, from the time I was still in the hands of my aunt, till my brother was born, then entering school, then knowing friends, learning to do things myself, advancing to teens, growing infatuation, learning my feelings, and also loving... There were many a things I felt wasted... many actions that should have done, and some shouldn't... But the past is gone... and would always remain as memories alone...

That wasn't the problem... though...
I could not see my future... I don't have the courage to approach it, I am scared... But my wheel continues its turning, and my body decaying every second... Would you come to my funeral? She once said that she'd love to have many of her loved ones in her funeral... I, as well as a many of others, would hope so, too. But I really wonder how many would come for mine...? I left bad impressions to many, and none to others...

The sorrow in me is deepened ever more... Is it really... nothing...?