My prayers had somehow not been answered. It is really funny how things turned out. It is amazing how the haze had disappeared. I thought it was the end, but I was wrong, terribly wrong.

I turn out to be having a very bad time in school. Classes don't seem to go so well, except maybe that I skipped my oral for like one week. :D Chemistry may indeed be the worst class so far. I seemed to be not keeping up with it already. The experiments had been a total disaster. Homework seemed to be crashing down on me. I've been working overtime everyday after the haze. (doubt there'll be any difference tomorrow)

Sometimes I want to speak, sometimes I want to express, sometimes I truly feel like bursting out, but why couldn't I? Everytime I glance, my head began to ache very badly, my eyes turned sore.
Aishiteru. anata o shinjiteiru, shikashi, kimi wa boku no kokoro o kizu tsuketa... doushite?
That could never receive an answer. I am just too...

I once stated that no matter what happens, I would complete the story of which I am writing. But, I am in doubt now. It may be just an illusion that I have been chasing. The same as Inire in my story, who chases for something he knew he could never get. I do not feel like continuing as a war had began in my thoughts.

Today, the dreaded day seemed to be coming. I hate my father coming back very early, which he did today. It is partly good, partly bad, more bad I shall say. I pray that his stress may be lifted. That 'bastard' should just die away, leave my dad alone, shithead!!! FXCK!!!

I hope this would be the last depressing post, and hopefully not the last post. It is all decided after the war. The one war that will destroy the life of one party and change its course. May he win the war. I pray inside, and hope that at least this paryer is answered. A rejoice or a goodbye? I hope all of you are still my friends...