How shall I start... Like that maybe...
I should feel happy for what I have. There are a lot of things that really are hard to explain and comprehend. For instance, my birth. It was only a few seconds difference. I could not come out. Quickly, the nurse took some equipment to pull me out. So, here I am now. But her action, was it worth it?
I grew up as a healthy, obedient and happy child, until I began to mature. I saw a lot of things, many things which do not explain why it was done, many things that are better without in this world. Such influence had certain impact on me. Now, I am lost, I don't really know who am I. What kind of a person am I to you, in your eyes?
It began in primary 6 when I suddenly felt that I had a new feeling in me. I did not know what was that. It was faint, but it was there. However, it vanished as fast as it appeared. My UPSR results disappointed me. I missed by an A to get a straight while my best friends got straight As. I continued in life towards secondary. The same feeling appeared again at the end of secondary 1. This time, it lingered till I was secondary 4. It slowly fainted from secondary 3.
At secondary 3, I went to apply for ASEAN scholarship. I did not know what I was doing, but I did indeed hope to get it. It turned out I failed. However, that might not seem so bad now that I sit here and thought about it. It was because of my failure, I was able to have that feeling again, this time stronger...
My PMR results were delighting - I got 8As. And I was worrying since that year I was terribly sick, absent from school once every term. I was happy as I was in my family (including cousins) the first person to get a straight A in PMR. It was also that year that I began to get a touch on a relation that carried on till now, though there was a big gap in the middle. The closer relationship began somewhere in sec 4. This relationship somehow became closer and closer. However, there were times that I doubt that it'll ever grow, and might get stuck just there, if not wane... till it vanishes again. I just wanted to say I love you, but it never could come out. I fear for it to disappear... again...
I shall stop here now... I am happy being able to talk to her now and then, being able to see her. And my friends, I am happy they are there. But are they true friends? That I don't know... I hate no one, but being hated, I could not help. It is up to you. Treat me as you like. That's why I am living, to give you a place to hold on till you find another. And always remember... smile ^^
I should feel happy for what I have. There are a lot of things that really are hard to explain and comprehend. For instance, my birth. It was only a few seconds difference. I could not come out. Quickly, the nurse took some equipment to pull me out. So, here I am now. But her action, was it worth it?
I grew up as a healthy, obedient and happy child, until I began to mature. I saw a lot of things, many things which do not explain why it was done, many things that are better without in this world. Such influence had certain impact on me. Now, I am lost, I don't really know who am I. What kind of a person am I to you, in your eyes?
It began in primary 6 when I suddenly felt that I had a new feeling in me. I did not know what was that. It was faint, but it was there. However, it vanished as fast as it appeared. My UPSR results disappointed me. I missed by an A to get a straight while my best friends got straight As. I continued in life towards secondary. The same feeling appeared again at the end of secondary 1. This time, it lingered till I was secondary 4. It slowly fainted from secondary 3.
At secondary 3, I went to apply for ASEAN scholarship. I did not know what I was doing, but I did indeed hope to get it. It turned out I failed. However, that might not seem so bad now that I sit here and thought about it. It was because of my failure, I was able to have that feeling again, this time stronger...
My PMR results were delighting - I got 8As. And I was worrying since that year I was terribly sick, absent from school once every term. I was happy as I was in my family (including cousins) the first person to get a straight A in PMR. It was also that year that I began to get a touch on a relation that carried on till now, though there was a big gap in the middle. The closer relationship began somewhere in sec 4. This relationship somehow became closer and closer. However, there were times that I doubt that it'll ever grow, and might get stuck just there, if not wane... till it vanishes again. I just wanted to say I love you, but it never could come out. I fear for it to disappear... again...
I shall stop here now... I am happy being able to talk to her now and then, being able to see her. And my friends, I am happy they are there. But are they true friends? That I don't know... I hate no one, but being hated, I could not help. It is up to you. Treat me as you like. That's why I am living, to give you a place to hold on till you find another. And always remember... smile ^^
>> §cripted by ~|Inire|~
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